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It Just Gets Better and Better!!

Mar 31

Forgive me if I don’t extend my usual greeting and engage in small talk. I can’t wait to address the “Commissionaire” before he leaves the Pacific North West. First of all “Bobbo” I can’t believe you were so close and didn’t look me up? As a matter of fact, I’m offended. We could have begun the preliminaries for our “Indian Strap Match” (apologies to the Aboriginal members). You know we could have had one of those “pressers” where we look menacingly into each others’ eyes. (Don’t worry they have an apple crate for just such occasions). Speaking of the press, sounds like they gave you a bit of a hard go on that “ticket thing” (You know, the one where you played the “big boss” card on the working stiff highway patrolman?) You should have called me. As usual when you are forced to stray from your notes and “ad lib”, you lapsed into the “duhhh, I just landed here and have no idea what’s going on” thing. “Bobby”…..I’m serious, I can help you, all you need to do is give me a call. Our sessions are even covered by……oh shit!!!!! I forgot, I’m not approved by you anymore; unfortunately you’ll have to pay out of your own pocket. But no worries, here’s a wee bit of a preview and you can see if you want to continue with me.

You seemed to have compounded the “ticket story” boner with something like this, when you got into the meat of your presentation; “Let’s face it in law enforcement because of stress, because of the nature of the work, because of the hours of the work, because of the collegial sort of nature of it, it’s a ripe area for behaviours that are less than professional.” Now I’m sure you will see the connection here, oh shit….scratch my last comment about seeing the connection and consult someone who is a wee bit psychologically sophisticated, as I’m about to go all Freudian on you. To most people your behaviour with the highway patrol member and your comments to the media just seem to be a rampant “sense of entitlement”. But to someone like me who really wants the best for you, they reek of “narcissism”. “Bobbo”, I hope you are braced for this, but this is a malignant form of self-love that can harm others in the long run. (I have first hand experience with this). Narcissism is established and upheld by the belief that you are the centre of the universe; that is, you (your profession, your organization) are unique, special, or number one. Firstly, every profession/person believes that; so which ones are right and which ones are wrong? And who gets to decide? Do you remember a chap (I do believe he was the Lord Mayor of London) named Sir Robert Peel? (Check this out with one of your instructors at Depot….better call ahead to make sure he has his pants on!) Well he was credited with saying (even though it seems “Peel’s Nine Principles” were developed by the Joint Commissioners of the Metropolitan Police, C. Rowan and R. Mayne) that the police are the public and the public are the police; the police are only members of the public that are paid to give full time attention to the duties incumbent on every citizen. Makes the nature of law enforcement sound pretty mundane doesn’t it? Come up here where I live and talk to some of the loggers and fisherman about how dangerous and stressful policing is.

Are you still with me? Hang on it won’t be long…..I know that attention span thing can be a bitch! You see, the narcissistic mind set comes from failing to learn as a child that you are not special and others don’t exist to serve your needs! Now I hope you are sitting down with “Teddy” as I thought a partial list of, let’s not call them symptoms but, indicators of rampant narcissism might assist you at this point:

1) Others have called you a “bully”, “vain”, or a “liar”……ooops, guilty on all counts.

2) You punish others when they don’t play by your rules……oh dear!

3) You exhibit “double standards” e.g. the wedding detail, the traffic ticket…still there “Bobbo”?

4) You have a hard time compromising or negotiating……what was that the Senior Executive just said?

5) You have a deep seated belief that you (or your organization) should come first
even at the expense of others……is that Municipal/Provincial police I hear cheering in recognition?

6) People always seem offended at what you say……..really?

7) You see yourself as better and more important than others and we should all recognize this and respect you……I’m biting my lip!!

8) You crave admiration and adoration…….I won’t even go there as there are certain limits to this exercise.

9) You like to assert your dominance or superiority over others, finding it almost second nature to do so……. can’t help myself; the speeding ticket?

10) You have a tendency to impose unrealistic demands on others (e.g. employees, friends, lovers, family)……….tasks vs. budgets???

11) You have a tendency to punish others when they don’t do what you want either passively (e.g. publicly criticizing others who have brought forth legitimate issues) or aggressively (e.g. shouting, being verbally abusive).

Well there it is “Bobbo”. Maybe you can get someone to read it to you on the plane on your way home? I am serious “amigo”, about taking you on as a patient. Can you imagine the fun we could have? (Once again I am compelled to bring to your attention the way I promote our match. This kind of chatter is really what sells tickets. “Bums in seats” won’t be coming out to see those “buggy whips” you call arms; and as for those legs, you could sue them for “lack of support”. On the contrary, the fans really want to see you teach me a lesson for being so disrespectful. Oh “Bobby” we could give them something to remember. What a show it would be.) Before I go here’s a little something to carry in your pocket; I give it to you as a friend:

“Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen”

—Winston Churchill

Dr. Mike Webster
Registered Psychologist
# 0655

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16 Comments
  1. So it might go like this……The “Commissionaire” asks Dr. Mike, “Would my cure be like equanimity?” Dr. Mike says, “Don’t confuse the Eagle with her nest.” The “Commissionaire” asks, “Well what’s equanimity then?” Dr. Mike says, “Sorry, I’m not a very good psychologist.” The “Commissionaire” says, “Oh, come on!” Dr. Mike says, “It’s okay.”

  2. Anonymous permalink

    Dr. Mike, your posts just keep getting more funny! Not only are you a good doctor and king of the wrassle ring, but a comedian as well?! Is it just me or have you been getting a steady supply of great material to work with these past few months…um I mean years?

  3. Anonymous permalink

    This was a great read. Especially the 11 pointers. Thanks. Let’s hope that he gets it! I used to have respect for him, but that has long subsided. He’s an ass. The only word to describe him, his antics and his behaviour. Sadly some people have to be the center of the universe. He should get off his pedestal and start learning something. One day someone will come and along and expose him for what he really is.

  4. Or maybe it would go this way……The “Commissionaire” asks his fortune teller, Madame Lasonga,”It seems obvious to others, but I don’t get the idea of ‘Karma’. Can you explain it to me?” She said, “Egocentrism will be punished.” The “Commish” says, “But sometimes crimes are never solved.” Madame Lasonga says, “Help me not to live a lie.”

  5. Anonymous permalink

    This unfortunately is “bobbing for more bobbies”-bob (including a controlling hand on the back of his head for the activity) and almost all white shirts both narcissistic and sociopathic. Hmmm….sounds like the creative conflict from yesterday didn’t go so well? Sounds like Mike didn’t relinquish you a pair of unsharded golden wrestling trunks which means “bobby penny” that your narcissism is allowing you to bask in your shit all weekend long in your current wrestling trunks. That’s going to leave a “rash”, best get out the baby powder as you’re going to need it. Well looks like we’ll have to postpone this ultimate match a little longer due to bob’s rash injury. I wonder how I’ll convey this message to the public? Newsflash: “Bobby boy sustains injury from shitting his wrestling trunks, tries turning shard-ridden trunks into an edible shit-cobbler surprise but audience doesn’t bite – Mike didn’t let bobby use his washer/dryer/and of course shower (I wouldn’t either) – fight postponed until further notice”. I think this is good communication considering he uses this form of communication to belittle/berate others and confident he’ll love the descriptions used.

    The cobbler was an interesting one but you must understand “bob” you can’t make chicken soup out of chickenshit. You must have substance – it isn’t always about image and how pretty your cobbler looks if no one can eat it. In earlier years I’m sure you and Julia Childs would’ve made great cooking partners.

  6. Scottish Soldier permalink

    Aye, Dr. Mike, where I come from, this affliction is known as Foot in Mouth Disease. It would not surprise me, in the least, if the Department of Agriculture puts an immediate quarantine order on Bobbo. That would mean “confined to barracks” as well as absolutely NO human contact for a minimum of 30 days.

  7. Anonymous permalink

    I wonder if they will start selling a bobblehead Bobbo to go along with red serge Barbie? I would so buy a bobblehead Bobbo and put him on the dash of my car. How entertaining it would be to watch Bobbo’s bald head bibble and bobble as I drive over the wobbly bobbly roads.

    • What’s going on with our Police Officers in Canada?

      What honor is there left in a force when the Commissioner of the RCMP is referred to a Bobble-head Bobbo; Strangely as it may sound it might get you cleared of the next traffic ticket out West.

      Is this the New Commissioner’ B. C. Bragging Rights or just a new level for this force?

      Does this story show how ignorant Canadians are and how confident police are today at sharing this kind of stuff in a public place? Please don’t take that guy to a camp fire and give him a few drinks.

      Please mussel this guy for more than 30 days.
      https://shediac1981.wordpress.com/2016/04/02/rcmp-commissioner-bob-paulson-traffic-stop-b-c-blues/

      • Anonymous permalink

        What it actually shows is how ignorant the RCMP are to brag (in this case the commish), without conscience in front of the public regarding the ticket issue and eluding as though he can get away without paying the find because well “I’m the commish”. I looked further into a video of this and then Bob has the audacity to say “no i just made it up – this story didn’t happen” yet still getting pounded on by one of the reporters yet still pushing him to say “did you get favourable treatment and not have to pay the ticket”? There was no answer after that.

        There is no honour and hasn’t been any honour in the force for years. The more informed public (people who take interest in police antics) are onto the RCMP. Why should anyone have honour for a commissioner when he doesn’t have honour when expressing himself about members with PTSD as ‘cuckoo’ using mannerisms such as twirling his fingers near his head to insinuate “PTSD members are nuts”, or other antics/insults towards members.

        You are correct…there is no honour in the RCMP and it needs to be earned.

  8. Anonymous permalink

    Hahaha…picture this Dr. Mike, a bobblehead Mike and a bobblehead Bobby, both in the wrassling ring, each wearing their shorts of color. You, in brilliant Irish Green with flashy gold stripes running down the sides. Bobblehead Bobby in…ummm….have I gone colorblind??? I see only brown? And his seem to be a bit baggy and droopy in the back. Oh my, his seamstress must have forgotten to take them in??? Moral of the story, watch your next step bobblehead Bobby or you could slip on something and fall.

  9. Scottish Soldier permalink

    Upon doing considerable “digging around”, there is a very strong rumour that “the commish” may well have been one of the youngest and certainly one of the last individuals that Dr. Cameron worked on at the Allan Memorial Institute on his MKUltra project. Apparently the patient could not be de-programed.

  10. CBC NB News;
    Assistant Commissioner Brown is retiring after serving in NB for 2 1/2 years.
    RCMP’s commanding officer in New Brunswick, Roger Brown, retiring
    Brown led force through Moncton murders, shale gas protests and etc.

    The commanding officer of the RCMP in New Brunswick, Assistant Commissioner Roger Brown, told the RCMP his last day on the job will be June 4, 2016, after a 36-year career with the force.

    http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/new-brunswick/rcmp-brown-retire-shale-moncton-1.3520208

  11. Aught Buck permalink

    Love the Churchill quotes Mike, there’s a leader.

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