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Resilience In Everyday Life

Sep 19

G’day all.  I would like to begin this piece by apologizing to “The Kraaken” for my snide remarks.  I admit when I read his critical words, I was offended (hurt?).  Those of you who know me personally know I have a moderate to large ego.  I continue to work on this and my only solace comes from the Buddha who said “To know the ego doesn’t exist you must first have one”.  I’m sorry “Kraaken”, I’m a work in progress.  On the other hand, we did create a lively discussion!  I will invite others more qualified than I to respond to your latest comment.

Now to business.  Is it only crisis that brings out the resilience in those that have it?  Do we all have it to the same degree?  Even more importantly can it be developed like a muscle?

Those that are highly resilient seem to possess a handful of characteristics in common.  Moreover those characteristics seem available to improvement in us all.  Let’s take a look at them:

Highly resilient folks are easily recognizable by their flexibility.  They thrive on change and adapt quickly to new circumstances.  They possess a firm belief that they can “bounce back” from almost anything.  You know, the old “As long as it doesn’t kill me…..” attitude?  This attitude is characterized by the supreme confidence that they can adapt to just about anything.

Some of us seem to be “born” with these qualities; and others, not so much.  However, there is no need to despair if you think you are in the latter group as we can all learn to be more resilient.  It seems to me, based upon clinical experience, that the critical variable is the way we perceive and think about ADVERSITY.  If we view it as a temporary thing, and as being susceptible to influence and change, we “have a leg up” on it.  On the other hand, if we reside in the group who view life’s challenges as fixed and unchangeable, we likely lack resilience.  For example, if you spend inordinate amounts of time, energy, and emotion in what the RCMP (whether supervisors, NHQ, other members, Health Services, Div. Reps., etc.)has done to you, prattling on about “right/wrong”, “fair/unfair”, “should/shouldn’t” have, you likely lack resilience.

But aren’t you fortunate, I am the “bearer of glad tidings”; for resilience is not only a set of skills to be used reactively, but they can also be deployed in a preventive fashion.  What follows are a handful of coaching points that are made up of my observations of you; when you have sat across from me in therapy and taught me how it’s done:

  1. The Importance of Attitude:  You resilient types experience a full range of emotion when you are “up against it”.  You mourn loss, endure frustration and the depths of depression but you have the ability to see the “silver lining” in the darkest of clouds.  You have within you, the constant ability to find the potential to learn and grow even when immersed in the toughest of times.  Research psychologists working in this area used to think this was the old General George Patton philosophy of “NEVER, NEVER, NEVER GIVE UP”!!  However today an ever accumulating mound of data indicates something different.  It seems the attitude is more like, ” HANG ON, I’VE BEEN THROUGH TOUGH TIMES BEFORE, I CAN SURVIVE THIS.  THINGS COULD BE WORSE!!”   Get busy and practice this.  Start small and gradually get bigger.  You can build your resilience just like you can build a bicep (they’ll never be as big as………..oh shit there’s that ego again!)
  2. The Natural Ability To Reframe:  Resilient types seem to be able to reframe challenges into opportunities to learn.  The same “bits and pieces” are there, but you have the ability to put another frame around them; challenges become opportunities to learn, pain becomes an opportunity to build new mental muscle, loss, the opportunity to build independence.  Give this a try.  Once again start small and get bigger.  Before you reframe the RCMP’s treatment of you from “malicious intent” to “inept management” try something smaller like reframing your child’s behaviour from “bad” to “thoughtless”.
  3. Showing Empathy: The resilient among you turns to others and demonstrates a genuine understanding of their plight.  The resilient person develops the ability to be “other centred”.  This ability builds more resilience, in addition to the neurotransmitter serotonin that is associated with feelings of happiness and well-being; that will lead to (can you guess?), that’s right more energy (really, positive mood states) to undertake and engage in further acts of kindness.  Try it!  (I didn’t apologize to the “Kraaken” just because he deserved one, but because it would be good for me as well).
  4. The Razor’s Edge:  Sure, it’s important to be in good emotional shape (e.g. out of your head and into your life) but what about physical condition?  You won’t like to hear this but I have an easier time working with the “hut, huts” (ERT types) and I’m convinced that they stay in good physical condition even when they are “up against it”.  Being physically fit actually builds your resilience; physical fitness in combination with mental muscle built through things like reading, relaxation, meditation, cross word puzzles, hobbies….as long as you aren’t reading RCMP policy (sorry Kraaken) or meditating on your next move in your battle with the  “outfit”..  This type of mental activity keeps your stress hormones low.  So, get busy……take the dog out for a walk and focus on your steps as you walk.  Count them up to ten, and then start over again.  If you lose your focus, be gentle with your self, just begin again…..1………2…….3……4……….
  5. Bust Your Gut:  Laughter, laughter, and more laughter; the more the better!  (And you must admit, you have an endless  supply of comic material coming out of NHQ?)  You are a champion if you can laugh in the face of adversity.  Since the time of Hans Selye (the stress guru), a tonne of research has accumulated demonstrating that laughter reduces stress to more moderate and manageable levels.  That same research suggests that “playing” or “experimenting” with a situation is a healthier solution to a challenge (even the big ones!) than “sheer determination”.

So there my dear friends is the recipe.  Can you do it?  If you wish to be the ” Captain of your own ship ” rather than have a bunch of pseudo-sailors at the helm, then build your resilience factor.  The revolution is coming, we are amassing in the hills and forests waiting for the right moment, you will be needed!  Look after yourself and those who depend upon you.  I believe you can do it!

“Be the Changes You Want In The World”

Dr. Mike Webster

Reg’d Psych  (#0655)

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From → Stress

14 Comments
  1. thekraaken permalink

    No apology necessary Dr. Webster, but thank you.

    As for your present column, I would agree that it is an excellent recipe, one which I practice myself.

  2. corbettstu permalink

    This post is, for the most part, related to Mr.or Mrs. Kraaken’s posts in past threads. I’m posting it here as this is the most recent article and will reach more readers. But I’d encourage everyone to check the last few statements from Webster and read Mr/Mrs. Kraaken’s input.

    Mr./Mrs. Kraaken,

    You’ve stated (in this case,specifically to me):
    “there are some concepts that I observed in my service that stood me and my colleagues in good stead, and I wanted to share them. I am sorry you do not find them cogent or germane.”

    it’s not that I don’t find them “cogent or germane” it’s that I find them absurd and ineffective. What good is taking notes and knowing policy when (unless you’re oblivious to the media, lawsuits,or working conditions) are completely ineffective? Have you not seen the counter-measures taken by the “leadership?” Attacking everyone who goes public by any means necessary. You’re posting comments to a site called “Re-Sergeance.” It might as well be called “Insurgent.” YOU, post under a pseudonym! Why? If you are actually a veteran “grunt” and not someone who’s interests are with the Whiteshirts, what are you afraid of? As per your “lessons,” you must “keep notes” and know policy.” So you’re covered right?! Speak freely and put your name to it. Trust me, the only thing the force will subject you to is a promotion.

    You stated:
    “Why are we going to any RCMP members for a union/association? Why are we not going to experts in that field who already have a proven track record, nation wide presence, structure and operations in place? In other words why are we not going to the Teamsters?”

    Creasser answered that one. So unless you’re gonna bring Jimmy Hoffa back from the dead so he can rally the constables into showing up at HQ, go toe-to-toe with Whiteshirts and beat them into modernizing the RCMP Why the hell would you want people who don’t know the dysfunction and decay of the RCMP to fix it? All the MPPA needs is for members to join. 51% of the members, sign on and the RCMP would be forced into entering the 21st century. Everything from proper training and staffing to equipment and pay.

    You stated:
    “The third concept I have noticed is movement. Suffice to say that if you do not like your surroundings, type of work, colleagues, supervisors, or even organization, its time to move.”

    First off, if all that happens is that members leave, nothing changes and the Whiteshirts would love it.. The RCMP remains fucked up and the cycle continues. Good people either leave or tolerate the mess and members and the public suffer….and the Whiteshirts and their lackey’s thrive.
    To summarize your solution you’re saying,” If you don’t like it, quit.” Again, that’s what management wants.
    Re-Sergeance is not about how to avoid the problems, it’s about challenging the status quo and reforming the the RCMP. As is the MPPA.

    You stated:
    “He (another ex-member) is getting his entitlements with Veterans Affairs for some compensation.”
    Again, this is what Whiteshirts want. They don’t want a challenge. That’s why they became Whiteshirts. They became handlers because it’s a helluva lot easier than being a cop. They’re quite content to have people get sick, quit and become someone else’s “problem.”
    How does this reform the RCMP? Remember, that’s the point of Re-sergeance. Re-Sergeance isn’t about treating the sickness. It’s about curing the disease of systemic dysfunction.

    You stated:
    “I do not have the permission of the members I know who have (“done battle”) with the system or some of the miscreants within it, to pass on their personal stories. If you do not believe that the concepts worked for us, there is nothing I could offer that you would believe.”

    Aren’t you the person who claims to be a “veteran?” Who essentially said it would be too lengthy to relate all your insight with your eons of service? I respect that you won’t disclose the “battles” of others but what about you? Surely, in all your years, you’ve done “battle” yourself once or twice? So let’s hear em.

    So it’s up to you now Kraaken! Also thanks for clearing up your misspelling. Have you considered a new pseudonym? Seen as Kraken is taken, maybe another marine animal? How’s about “Jelly-fish?” They passively follow the current, can’t think as they have no brain, can’t fight as they have no spine. They literally just go with the flow.
    Lastly, your latest responses are all marked with an annoying amount of passive-aggressiveness. You were more respectable when you weren’t playing the injured-innocent.
    And frankly you really don’t sound like a constable. You really do come across as a Whiteshirt, attempting to pose as a cop.

    As you know, Re-Sergeance protects the identity of members. As such, you could provide Webster with your real name and rank and He will not post it. A caveat being if you are in fact a junior rank, but your dad is “Superintendent of Refilling the Printer Ink,” (or some other useless position created for those who couldn’t hack it as a cop) that should be disclosed.
    And if it turns out, you are an a actual career constable, I sincerely pity you. You’ve been sold a lie and you’ve spent your entire career living it.

    Regards,
    Stu Corbett

    P.S.
    As far as you replying to me with,” I am not going to comment on any of the rest of your condescension.” I wasn’t condescending you. I was being blunt and straight-forward. Webster and others can take the high road. I’m here to call out bullshit. So if I hurt your feelings, go pull the stuffing outta your teddy bear then send your response.

  3. Bob permalink

    Dr. Webster – One of the areas we explored in Training before I left was around establishing some form of resilience training for members. Do you have any thoughts around this?

    In my educational life we explored the concept and practice of building resilient communities in terms of natural emergencies/disasters with the Canadian Red Cross as one f our projects. Would be interesting if this has potential application for police agencies and its employees?

    I suspect also that resilience and adaptive strategies are somewhat different?

    Thoughts?

  4. thekraaken permalink

    Well, Mr. Corbett, your vitriol notwithstanding, I am not commenting here to convince you of anything, nor as I intoned offer a panacea for the ills that have befallen members. With the many different situations that occur I do not believe there is a one size fits all solution, which Dr. Webster has alluded to in his many articles. If they help but one person deal with a situation, helping out a fellow member is all one can ask.

    I used the assessment example primarily because I have had to fight two of them, one all the way to Federal Court. And I won. I also assisted more than one member with theirs and they won. I did not have to go public, shout from the roof tops or anything else of that nature.

    I have also fought to the Federal Court on a PRP, and won. Why? Because I had the documentation and policy to fight with. As I mentioned poor supervisors rarely have good documentation, follow policy, and other than bullying, cannot support their position. What type of people does a bully not pick on? The ones they cannot defeat and the ones that fight back.

    With respect to the MMPAC I can only assume that the National Spokesperson does not have the numbers or percentage at his fingertips because the numbers are probably embarrassingly small. Information meetings have occurred locally with less than a handful of interested members. My father was a rep for the ICWU for many years and I have seen what a union can do to positively impact working conditions etc. The large unions are already at full steam, and one like the Teamsters that has a public service division is no less capable than any other organization to represent the uniqueness of a given occupation. The membership determines what it needs and the union fights for it. The principles are the same.

    You opine that my comments are all marked with an annoying amount of passive-aggressiveness. Would you prefer that I sprinkle my comments with your style of insult and vitriol? Would that make my comments more understandable for you? I am sorry, I will not insult your intelligence or service or writing style or name.

    The RCMP is a very large and ponderous ship. I figured out a long time ago that insulting the Commissioner or any other member in trying to accomplish something is a futile gesture. I do however did relish the look on the OICs face when he was served a cease and desist letter for harassment by a member from her lawyer. You can sue the Force, get money, etc., create headlines, but you will not change the course of the ship. It will take a union to force change for the members good. Like Dr. Webster pointed out recently, you do not need the RCMP in your life, and I would add that once you have decided to leave, be done with it. If you think that anything you “inflict” upon the Force will change it, I would disagree.

    You emphasize strongly that I should identify myself by name and rank, yet do not insist others do the same. I would opine that if I were to do that, your ad hominem style would immediately go into over drive. You already have two observations, one for a Constable and another if my father (even labeling him) was or is in the Force. So why would I venture that when you have already labelled me and you don’t even know my rank?

    My main goal in the Force is to catch bad guys. I have and will support my fellow members where I can. I am not in need of spawning a paradigm shift in the RCMPs miscreants or unsuitable managers. When I leave, the RCMP will not form any part of my life, good or bad.

    “So if I hurt your feelings, go pull the stuffing outta your teddy bear then send your response.” Sorry Mr. Corbett, you have not hurt my feelings. But I will check my teddy bear for jellyfish or white shirts that may be lurking in there waiting to ruin my career. You have disregarded my observations which is perfectly fine. They have worked and if someone wishes to try them, that is their decision.

    • corbettstu permalink

      Mr/Mrs. Kraaken,
      Sigh, as always, where to start.

      You stated:
      “With respect to the MPPAC I can only assume that the National Spokesperson does not have the numbers or percentage at his fingertips because the numbers are probably embarrassingly small. Information meetings have occurred locally with less than a handful of interested members.”

      The RCMP is being forced to allow union representation. Management is terrified of this. In the MPPA’s hands, it would mean the end of the “broken culture.” As you clearly know, it would be better for management to have anyone other than the MPPA doing this. If the MPPA represents members, They know all too well the problems and how to address them.
      In your own words,” (to the MPPA) Where do you go to get specific expertise? I would not go to Dr. Webster to seek guidance on my renovations”
      So why would you want a union that has no knowledge of policing over the MPPA ? By your own logic, the best representation would come from the MPPA. The MPPA didn’t pop-up overnight. It’s been fighting and won the right for members to unionize for years.
      Those “small numbers” you speak of, do you think they would be higher if the Teamsters were trying to represent members? Or do you think that it has more to do with fear of reprisal, management blocking the MPPA from contacting members or what psychologists/sociologists call
      “learned helplessness?” (which is when people start to believe that, no matter what, nothing will change)

      You stated:
      “I used the assessment example primarily because I have had to fight two of them, one all the way to Federal Court. And I won. I also assisted more than one member with theirs and they won. I did not have to go public, shout from the roof tops or anything else of that nature.”

      First off, what’s wrong with going public? Going public is why whiteshirts have come under scrutiny. All the lawsuits and media attention have brought the dysfunction to light.
      So you’ve taken your boss to court twice? Helped others do it? But claim you’ve never had “to go public, shout from the rooftops….”Huh? if there’s one thing that “goes public,” it’s taking the RCMP to court. Going public is what brought the “broken culture” to light. So if what you claim is true, why are you boasting about keeping it quiet? Who does that benefit?

      You stated:
      “I figured out a long time ago that insulting the Commissioner or any other member in trying to accomplish something is a futile gesture.”

      That’s an unusual and very telling statement.I have to ask, what do you think of Paulson? You’ve had a long career so you’ve seen Commissioners come and go. You’re anonymous so speak freely.

      You stated:
      You emphasize strongly that I should identify myself by name and rank, yet do not insist others do the same. I would opine that if I were to do that, your ad hominem style would immediately go into over drive. You already have two observations, one for a Constable and another if my father (even labeling him) was or is in the Force. So why would I venture that when you have already labelled me and you don’t even know my rank?

      First, I wanted to to I.D. yourself because your posts/direction (including this one) serve the whiteshirts interests and not the constables ie. “don’t go public, don’t join the MPPA, don’t insult Paulson,” etc.
      Also, I never said you should publicly I.D. yourself. I said you could send your member info to Webster and he won’t disclose it but could verify that you are actually a cop. Webster could then verify that you’re a mere serf. You can still do this and Webster can reply to any of my posts and confirm your claim that you’re member and not a whiteshirt.

      You Stated:
      You say “If you think that anything you “inflict” upon the Force will change it, I would disagree.”

      The media attention that’s been given to the hundreds of lawsuits, says otherwise.

      Lastly You stated:
      “You opine that my comments are all marked with an annoying amount of passive-aggressiveness. Would you prefer that I sprinkle my comments with your style of insult and vitriol? Would that make my comments more understandable for you? I am sorry, I will not insult your intelligence or service or writing style or name.”

      Wow. Even your explanation for your passive-aggressiveness is filled with passive-aggressiveness. Just out of curiosity, if you were to insult my service, how would you do that?

      Anyway, in keeping with my “vitriol,” keep talking Jelly-Fish. You may the the best recruiter the MPPA ever had.

      Regards,
      Stu Corbett (51709)

  5. thekraaken permalink

    Mr. Corbett, “Sigh, as always, where to start.”

    “As you clearly know, it would be better for management to have anyone other than the MPPA doing this. If the MPPA represents members, They know all too well the problems and how to address them.”

    I disagree. Any union can obtain the necessary expertise by drafting members as stewards for example. Their expertise that I referenced is primarily scope and reach (not to mention clout). Something the Teamsters have that the MPPA does not. Mr. Creasser advised that given a time next year they could not have a recruiting drive at every detachment in Canada at the same time. The Teamsters could.

    “First off, what’s wrong with going public?”

    Nothing, I did not say it should not be done, I just said I did not have to do it, which is not a facet of knowing policy and having documentation, hoisting them on their own petard so to speak.

    “”Huh? if there’s one thing that “goes public,” it’s taking the RCMP to court”

    Not necessarily so. The Force did not send out a press release with the details of our move into Federal Court. Why would they? I did not so how would the press find out? The Federal Court maintains a website for the cases that they hear. You may not know, but there is a stage before it goes formally where a Federal Judge has an informal hearing to see if the litigants can settle prior to formal court. This is not publicized. Its where the Judge tells one side they are out to lunch or not. Gives one side the ability to capitulate gracefully. If embarrassing publicly is the game then you should put out a press release. I did not see the need to do that to achieve my outcome.

    “So if what you claim is true, why are you boasting about keeping it quiet?”

    Why would you think it was not true? Besides I was not boasting I was relaying fact. I do not question your treatment by the RCMP, so why would you question my information?

    “That’s an unusual and very telling statement.I have to ask, what do you think of Paulson? You’ve had a long career so you’ve seen Commissioners come and go. You’re anonymous so speak freely.

    Not really, I think one can accomplish ones goals without insults and getting another’s back up which will not assist in moving anything forward. That is what happens when you insult and debase the “other side”. I have not seen one Commissioner that I would have lunch with, especially since the Commissioner is now Deputy Minister status. (IMO Its not proper to have that position under the direct thumb of a politician.)

    “First, I wanted to to I.D. yourself because your posts/direction (including this one) serve the whiteshirts interests and not the constables ie. “don’t go public, don’t join the MPPA, don’t insult Paulson,” etc.”

    Your opinion, but I do not understand how relating how I was able to successfully navigate against management helps the whiteshirts. Not sure how taking the Force to Federal Court does not help the members. Not sure how helping members in anyway helps management other than correct their errors. Where did I say don’t go public? Do not put words in my mouth, I stated I did not do that in reference to accomplishing what I set out to. I did not say don’t join the MPPA, I merely opined it would be better IMO to join a formidable in place union. Insulting the Commissioner or any other member is not productive IMO. Maybe it works for you, but that is not my experience. Please be more accurate if you are going to paraphrase something I wrote.

    “The media attention that’s been given to the hundreds of lawsuits, says otherwise.”

    You yourself have stated that the culture is broken. So now we are not broken as a result of the hundreds of lawsuits? From the Task Force on Governance and Cultural Change, Duxbury, etc, what has changed? Precious little I would submit. As I stated before, the only time things will improve is with a union. I would love to be a fly on the wall in Ottawa when someone announces: My God, they have joined the Teamsters!

    “Anyway, in keeping with my “vitriol,” keep talking Jelly-Fish. You may the the best recruiter the MPPA ever had.”

    Why do you feel the need to insult constantly? From calling me a whiteshirt, a Div Rep. (two entities you obviously despise) to calling me a jellyfish you cannot post your comments without a couple. Is this a learned response or something you grew up with? I was always under the opinion that any position is not inherently deserving of derision, rather the person in the position by their actions. I have known a few Div Reps who were genuinely concerned about and tried to help members despite the lousy system, so I would not foster a general hate towards them.

    As for the MPPA, I really do not object to it, I stated my opinion, but the membership will ultimately decide unless Ottawa does it for us. If I make someone take an interest and perhaps do something, how can that be a bad thing?

    One last thing, before you label someone you may want to do some research:
    http://www.planetdeadly.com/animals/dangerous-jellyfish

  6. corbettstu permalink

    You can write, re-write,reiterate and rationalize all you like. The bottom line is every single element of your desired course of action would benefit management more than the members.

    -a trade union over the MPPA
    -follow the RCMP’s “system” and it will work for you
    -that members don’t need to go public
    -that if you don’t like the force, quit
    -that once you quit, don’t take action

    You’re correct that all those studies haven’t fixed the force. It will be an association/union that forces the change. But for you to say all those members who’ve gone public haven’t made an impact is absurd and more importantly insulting. It’s their personal stories that have really let the public know what ‘s wrong. In addition, they’ve made themselves targets. The whiteshirts have used every dirty little trick they can to undermine/attack them. Do I need to list the counter-tactics used by the Leadership? Are you that disconnected from reality?
    Unlike you, they went public in the best interest of all the members. Unlike you, they put reforming the RCMP ahead of their own personal interests. What did you do, when you “did battle”? You took the path of least resistance. You got what you wanted.
    Your own words:
    “I did not see the need to do that (go public) to achieve my outcome.”
    You wouldn’t understand this, but some people look beyond their self-interest and consider the greater good.
    But, for the record, we’re all real happy things have always turned out for you Kraaken!

    Twice now, you’ve used my “service history,” to bolster your point. Unless your being disingenuous, you have no idea what my service experience was. One of your posts even stated words to the effect, I could criticize my service. Feel free to do so. Please share with the class my service history.

    Also I asked you “what do you think of Paulson?” You replied you “won’t insult people.” (you’ll insult everyone else, but not Paulson) I didn’t even say you had to insult him. I asked what you honestly thought of him?

    As far as the Teamsters over the MPPA. It wasn’t the Teamsters that won the members the right to an independent association, it was the MPPA and it wasn’t easily won. The MPPA earned the right to represent members and members need to appreciate that.

    You complain about my “insulting” you.
    I’m glad you feel insulted, because you’ve earned it. You may be the most passive-aggressive person I’ve ever come across.
    You insult Webster, calling his statements “babble” and that he’s “obsessed” with Paulson.( If Paulson shouldn’t be the focus of criticism, who should?) You even had the audacity to accept Webster’s apology to you, despite the fact he said nothing offensive to you. Have you apologized to Webster for your “babble” and “obsession” comments?
    Knowing full well that too few members have signed up with the MPPA, you play dumb and ask Creasser “how many members have joined?” When he states more need to join, you proclaim “embarrassing few have.”
    Then there’s your constant routine of making bold,confident statement of what should happen. But the moment you’re challenged, you revert to its “just an opinion,” or some other wishy-washy bullshit mixed in with a lot of ambiguous tripe. All the while, avoiding the difficult questions.
    I can’t emphasize this enough. You appear to be the master of “attack-get cornered-then claims of “that’s not what I meant!”

    Again, I’ll ask. If you are what you claim to be, send Webster your name, reg #. He knows enough people that he can confirm you’re a junior rank and can confirm this to the rest of us. He will respect your wish to remain anonymous. You have nothing to lose, by doing so and may even get some respect from the constables. From me , you’ll get genuine pity. If you turn out to be an actual cop, I’ll never slag you off again. You’re too far gone.

    Lastly,
    You asked me “Why do you feel the need to insult constantly? From calling me a whiteshirt, a Div Rep. (two entities you obviously despise) to calling me a jellyfish you cannot post your comments without a couple. Is this a learned response or something you grew up with?”
    First off. I make no apologies. I well and truly despise whiteshirts. I’ve me one (an Inspector) who was nothing but respectable. He cared nothing for the status que and was all about right from wrong. The rest- pond scum.
    Anyway to answer your question. It’s definitely a learned response.It’s something that seems to flare-up whenever I encounter people who are completely full of shit. People who are happy to let others get screwed over, as long as they’re sitting pretty. People who are full of “solutions” but upon closer examination, aren’t providing any solutions at all. People who bluster one minute but run like a rabbit once confronted.
    But there is a cure.
    With your help, I’ll be able to get past my insulting nature. Just send your identity to Webster directly and ask that he not disclose it to Re-Sergeance. In turn, Webster can confirm that you’re actually a member and not a someone trying to subvert RCMP reform. ie.a whiteshirt

    By the way,I see you’ve attached a link to a Jelly-Fish website. Just to clarify, when I call you a Jelly-Fish, I didn’t mean that you’re an actual Jelly-Fish. It was more about them being spineless, brainless and subject to forces (currents) beyond your control. At no point was I implying you were an actual Jelly-Fish. It was a metaphor. I could have said you were a nudibranch but most people aren’t aware of them. But I thank-you for the link. I appreciate your attempt to educate me on Jelly-Fish. I’m actually a veteran scuba diver so if you’d like, we can get past my calling you a Jelly-Fish and move on to calling you a more practical pseudonym. Off the top of my head, I’m pretty sure “Douchebag” will be available. Is Douchebag okay with you? And is it Mr.or Ms/Mrs. Douchebag?
    Just as you tried to educate me on Jelly-Fish, I’m sure I can find a link on douchebags but I figure you could just google it.

    Maybe I’m being too severe. I think we need to make amends, with each other and start fresh with our names. Mine’s public. Where’s yours?
    And please feel free to explain my service experience ( again, you’re referenced twice but been very vague. If you would like to elaborate, please do so.

    All me (and my vitriol aside)
    On behalf of the MPPA. would you agree to meeting with a MPPA member? This would be pivotol not only to the our conflcit (which in the big picture, is irrelevant) but ultimately, would help RCMP reform.
    Certainly, it would be a learning experience for both you and the MPPA. So let’s try and forget about my vitriol and make this meeting happen. I assure you, I would have no part in the meeting. I doubt the MPPA would want any of my input. I’m not even a mountie, right now. But any meeting between you and the MPPA can only clear the air.
    Regards,

    Corbett (51709)

    ,

  7. thekraaken permalink

    The last ‘concept’ I am going to relate is communication. In my examples there is a correlation between them all. The one important thread that binds them is in fact communication.

    For example, in relating what I had done personally to help myself and fellow members, the aim was to communicate the ideas. Once presented you normally would expect some discourse on the nuts and bolts of whether it could work for others or some specific reasoning. In my fostering the type of communication that followed I hope that it shows a course of action that is what poor management and poor supervisors can use against you and should be guarded against. That course of action as it unfolded here was one of segue, innuendo, name calling, insults, demands, and attempts to discredit. In other words, a movement away from thoughtful analysis/discussion of the idea(s), and any value that could be gleaned, expanded upon or related to.

    As with poor management, harassment, lousy employee relations, etc., the nuts and bolts became secondary to the interlocutor. Replaced with who you are , gender, the tone of the comment, association, whether or not the person relating the idea is real, has any experience, downward generalization, etc.

    The segues became endless as the dialogue showed, and moved any discussion of the nuts and bolts of the ideas to the background to focus on interjected items. Similar in nature to a poor supervisors interaction on an assessment meant to discredit you or unit meetings where the supervisor wants to belittle or color you as ineffective or irrelevant. Its a tactic that we all know too well at the receiving end of a poor supervisors limited repertoire of employee relations. Don’t fall for it.

    Another example of that is when you are in court. You have what I call the ‘Cobb Method”. Those that have been giving evidence when he is defense, know what I mean. Its where the defense goes at you with preambles, triple questions, and setups like: “Would you agree Cst/Cpl/Sgt that a competent police officer takes good notes?”; “Would you agree that those notes should be accurate and detailed?” Then proceeds to show the judge where your notes are not, all the while trying to rile you up further discrediting you. A really proficient lawyer does not try that route to discredit you because they can zero in on what they want and bring it out to the judge without all the innuendo. A good supervisor or manager communicates concisely and clearly without the Cobb Method. A member dealing with poor management or supervision should do the same.

    Connotation is a word’s underlying meanings; it is all the stuff we associate with a word. Buttercup can be used derogatorily or not. Suck it up buttercup or pretty as a buttercup.

    Denotation is a word’s literal dictionary meaning. A buttercup is a flower.

    When communicating, written or verbal it is important to use the correct one to get your message or point across. Do not let yourself be segued from your message or idea when confronted by the noted tactics, written or verbal.

    • corbettstu permalink

      Kraaken,
      Well, it took a couple reads. Okay, a few reads….okay I tried reading it a bunch of times but found it it so boring, meandering and pointless it was painful. Every time I tried, I ended up losing interest and found myself looking for something more engaging. On one occasion, I’m pretty sure I went from trying to read your post to quitting and checking out The Weather Network.

      Anyway, I think the gist of what you were trying to say was. I used manipulation to steer the conversation from what you were trying to convey with your “Lessons.”

      I think that’s what you were getting at.
      When you stated:
      “That course of action as it unfolded here was one of segue, innuendo, name calling, insults, demands, and attempts to discredit. In other words, a movement away from thoughtful analysis/discussion of the idea(s), and any value that could be gleaned, expanded upon or related to.”
      But I’m pretty sure it’s obvious to anyone following the thread that what I was saying all along was that everything you want is what management would want.
      I believed (and still do) you’re doing a poor impersonation of a constable and your interest are with whiteshirts and I called you on it.
      I’ve given you numerous occasions to demonstrate that, if nothing else, you’re sincere (misguided and self-deluded but sincere) and not someone trying to undermine reform.
      You’ve avoided every offer.

      With this “lesson,” I’m pretty sure you’re out of steam. I’m still not entirely sure what the point was.
      I’d discredit it as I’ve done with your others, but this one is so off the rails, I can’t be bothered. By the end, you were giving us grammatical lessons. What the hell was that about?. I can’t be bothered to “get it” but if it makes you feel any better, from now on I’ll call you “Buttercup.”

      Seen the latest news on the MPPA’s website? Turns out Paulson, Callen, Hartl and some seriously unethical doctors are facing a class-action lawsuit. Who do you think will have a bigger impact?
      You, your notes and the Teamsters?
      Or the people on the MPPA’s website people taking the fight to management?

      Anyway,
      Chin up, Buttercup!

      Regards,
      Corbett (51709)

  8. thekraaken permalink

    Face it corbett, you got done. I played your management type game and you lost. You don’t like what worked for some members fine. You said so. Leave it at that Mr Nov 2004. Oh and by the way, MMPA members number approximately 2300 out of 18,000+. Too bad one has to read that in the Province newspaper. You might wish to advise the National Spokesperson for the MPPA as it seems he does not have access to figures the paper does. Good luck, its not your monkeys, nor is it your circus anymore so get a life.

    • corbettstu permalink

      Finally! It took a lot of needling but you finally admitted that you know exactly who I am. It was pretty obvious with your previous remarks but it wasn’t enough.. Now let’s see if you’ve got the guts to tell me who exactly you are!
      Come on tough guy, if you’re gonna take shots, be man enough to put your name to it……
      Whadda ya say Buttercup?
      You gonna man-up?

    • corbettstu permalink

      P.S. On a lighter note, it’s refreshing to hear your speak without the faux-intellectualism and smug pretentiousness that are a staples of your posts. Don’t get me wrong. It’s the same old evasive gibberish you’ve always posted, But it’s nice to see you’ve dropped all that for actual- human dialogue. Although I’m not certain what victory you’re claiming.
      Nevertheless, it’s a refreshing change.
      All your past “word-salad” postings sounded as if Sarah Palin had mated with a thesaurus and 9 months later,, out popped you.
      Anyway, time to come clean Buttercup. A reasonable person (or someone with basic values) would agree that once you start publishing personal details about someone, choosing to hide behind anonymity. tends to end the credibility of the comments.
      Would you agree?
      Also, I continue to get the feeling you’re holding back.I bet there’s so much more you’d like to post about me. right?
      I’d be happy to provide the moderator with my email or any contact info, should you be agreeable to chatting and hopefully meeting. You’re call, Buttercup.

      P.S. I disagree with the rcmp, “not being my monkeys.” I’m talking to my very own little monkey right now. So please take a moment from throwing feces and introduce us to the real you.

    • corbettstu permalink

      Also,
      Why don’t you send your remarks to the MPPA. Are you that gutless that you anonymously tell others to write emails to third parties? That’s a special kinda cowardice. For once in your life, get a spine and do it yourself and don’t hide online. But you won’t will you? You’ve got bluster and bravado, as long as you’re anonymous. What would you say face -to-face, in a conflict/argument with Creasser, or with me? My guess is it would never happen. You’d do anything and everything to avoid it.

      So YOU tell Creasser the answer to the rhetorical question you asked him a few weeks ago. But for god’s sake, for once in your gutless existence, put your name to it. This will be a moment in your life when you can say to yourself, “I was brave!……sorta”

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