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Call Me Crazy: A Brief Overview Of How To Save The RCMP

Apr 19

I’m going to take a shot at this topic with all assumptions in place, i.e. the Canadian public has arisen and elected a federal government who is interested in saving our national police service and the membership of the RCMP has become unionized and “sick to death” of being oppressed by a group of DHQ and NHQ sycophants. Please remember that these comments are being made by a psychologist trained in the application of Systems Theory (e.g. Sluzki, 1983; Wilden 1980). I do not claim to be an expert in organizational management; moreover, in this case I view that as an advantage.

I have often shared my opinion on this blog as to how the RCMP would be better off if drastically downsized; however in doing so we must be careful not to put strategy before people. This means that I would consider doing the following:

1) I would need to sift through the Senior Executive and decide who I could trust, and what value that person could bring to the metamorphosis and the “new look” RCMP. (I would rely heavily on the MPPAC , responsible, and trusted senior members for this). I would need to ask those who I have identified as having a future in the organization, for a commitment, be straight with them, and communicate my vision of the RCMP in the future.

2) I would need to appoint a “rescue team”. I would not be able to undertake such a mission on my own. I would require 2-3 Senior Executives from either DHQs or NHQ that have managed to maintain the respect of the majority of the membership, and are willing to work to gain the trust of the rest.

3) I would need to draft a clear “change message”; looking to the “rescue team” for guidance, yet maintaining the final decision option. The message would need to be brief and compelling; it would contain three elements 1) the case for change, 2) the view of the organization in the future and 3), a strong commitment to what will be preserved. Those who figure in the RCMP’s future should understand the case for change. The view of the future will enhance and flesh out the case for change. Finally, I will need to find something about the organization’s recent past that I can genuinely appreciate and would not feel uncomfortable publically supporting. Those members who decide to remain will need to know that I as the (temporary) Commissioner value their efforts in contrast to most of those who preceded them in the commissioned ranks.

4) I would need to adopt a policy of communication that is constant, candid, and two-way; something that was non-existent in the past! I will need to develop a “trap-line” to assist me in staying in touch with all concerns of the membership. This is where I see the cobbling of a working relationship with MPPAC. I could begin the scheduling of quarterly meetings with MPPAC “reps” who could bring forward the issues raised in their regular section meetings (while maintaining an “open door” policy….much easier to do with a downsized organization).

5) I believe that with a different mandate (i.e. the exclusive responsibility for enforcing federal statutes), I would need to invest in my investigators and provide them with regular and contemporary training. I would need to be clear about new performance expectations. Perhaps I could show my trust in my remaining personnel by allowing them to identify “best practices”. During my temporary time at the helm, I would take advantage of competent police persons (exclusive of rank or section) and request that they assist in establishing competencies for the (reduced) tasks of the “new look” RCMP. I would like to enlist them as “trainer-coaches” to assist in the development of their peers.

6) Any major changes in the organizational structure would be preceded by clear and straightforward information related to how decisions will be made that affect the structure of the RCMP and individuals working within it. I would make every effort to explain that the downsizing of the RCMP is not a random act and that strong performance and support for the new direction is a sure way to increase personal satisfaction and reduce work related stress.

7) My communication with the membership would not resemble “Pope-like” appearances on the NHQ “balcony”. I will make an effort to show my respect for the “new” look RCMP by frequently and personally selling criticism of the “old” RCMP. Those who wish to stay must be given frequent opportunities to present and vent their feelings (as representatives of the membership the MPPAC could play a critical role here). Members should be in constant receipt of status updates on the new direction. Once again, these meetings may be best handled by the MPPAC and focused on measureable goals, clear milestones, with questions and criticism welcomed. The new RCMP will not be “my” RCMP; it will be in the care of the current membership who represents the public they serve. We as a family, and those we serve, will take every opportunity to celebrate small wins, progress, and successfully completed new tasks.

To conclude, when undertaking a task of this nature I firmly believe that two process variables must be kept in mind; first, when carrying out a change (on a massive, rigid organization like the RCMP) it is central that the effect on survivors is constantly monitored; and second, those coaching the change must remain ever flexible. In this way the chances of morale sinking unnoticed, losing our best people, and obtaining “minimal buy-in” from those remaining will be reduced.
Well there it is! Even as I read it over, I am not satisfied! There is something missing………it’s YOU!! I could not do this without your skill, experience, and dedication. I would ride on your shoulders; I would be nothing without you; for it is you who are the RCMP!!!! Rest assured, we will be in a battle to save a once National icon; and as your temporary Commissioner, I pledge this to you, I will not eat until you have eaten and I will not sleep until you have slept.

At your service,
Dr. Mike Webster
Reg’d Psych. (#0655)

P. S. G’day “Brutal Bob”………well after some calling in of favours I have a lead on a “little person” who might be interested in “kicking your……..” Well, to that later, right now tell me what you think of this? It wasn’t easy to make this contact, as I’ve indicated I had to call in some old favours. The sport of “midget wrestling” (not a popular term with “The Little People of America” [LPA]) has fallen out of favour as it tends to portray little people in a negative light. However, I located a contemporary Mexican Star working for “Consejo Mundial Lucha Libre” whose ring name is “Mascarita Sagrada”. He could be persuaded for a price to put a damper on his red hot temper. He is likely to go off “like a cut snake”, if he doesn’t “go over” the likes of you, but he’ll make you look good before he” finishes you off”………oh shit I’ve done it again!!! You know I’m really having trouble with this “what’s a threat and what isn’t”. This new Conservative scare mongering you are buying from your “evil twin” (shit!!!!!…….is that considered off-side as well?), doesn’t look good on ya’ mate. “Down under” they favour “blokes” who can think for themselves. Think it over, and let me know where you are on this. You might build your confidence with “Mascarita Sagrada” and find the “cajones” to either agree to the Tag Team with “The Pro” and I or maybe even the Chain (or Cage) Match with me. Who knows……miracles still happen! And look what you are learning about Professional Wrestling! Good thing you became a cop, I think you are too much of a “tight ass” to enjoy an hour in the ring entertaining people! Anyhooooo “Brutal Bobby”…….. loosen up that “anal pore”, you did not look comfortable in front of the Committee the other day. Let’s have some fun?
“Iron Mike”

P.P.S. My apologies once again to the LPA. I am in complete agreement with you, with regard to the use of the term “midget”. It is entirely degrading. I used it in this case as the “bloke” I’m talking to wouldn’t understand anything else.

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3 Comments
  1. To the politicians that read these posts I personally know several who do. Unlike Mr. Harper, these politicians seem to be genuinely interested in reforming the force (instead of Harper who’s happy to just control it)
    Dr. Webster has just provided you with a plan for reform. Bringing him in, along with other qualified academics may well be the RCMP’s salvation. Another asset would be former, Crown Lawyer, Valerie Campbell. Ms. Campbell used to provide workshops to constables on all aspects of domestic violence and was passionate about it. At depot, we did computer modules, clicked some buttons and the RCMP deemed us “qualified.” I learned more in an hour from Ms. Campbell than any, by the numbers, dribble taught at depot.
    Of course, this government has no interest in domestic violence. It’s wants Canadians to fear the “real” threat. Those evil Muslim extremists!
    I’m guessing there’s far more women and girls who live in real fear, every,single day from a real threat.

  2. Scottish Soldier permalink

    Aye Iron Mike, is this the same Brutal Bob who was raised in and around Lachute? I think he used to hang out at Kevin Lowe’s Dairy. He used to bully the young kids for their ice cream.

    I am surprised that he has not taken up your challenge. A lot of the folks from that area are strong Irish or Scottish stock and never shy away from any kind of an offer.

    Ticket Master is still holding my money.

  3. Anonymous permalink

    I’m wondering if ‘Bob’bles hasn’t responded yet as he’s unsure what he’ll wear for such a sporting event or even accept the challenge? Mike, i think ‘Bob’bles is going to need an extra small pair of golden speedos and high-boots, and his own wrestling mask (also in gold color). We can call him ‘El Spooner Enmascarado’ (in English this is ‘The Masked Spooner’….so says google translate). I figure from all that day-in-day-out tough guy projected chest puff, what he’s really trying to tell us is that he needs a hug, but not before he sports up in his new golden wrestling attire. I would hope the new ‘Enmascarado’ costumed persona doesn’t steer off the tracks for the worst with him attending upscale erotic clubs followed up with an arsenal of whips and chains. This is all about the wrestling match of Mascarita Sagrada vs El Spooner Enmascardo (the cop formerly known as Bob – just like the artist formerly known as Prince).

    Mike, we’re going to need a press conference to promote the event, i mean we can’t have a live event (pay-per-view, free-view, or other) without some trash-talking. We’ll have to make it look official, there will be weigh-ins, the costumes will have to glimmer and flash brightly in the press show lights and then let the bantering between the two wrestlers fly. We’ll need a ‘mounted police athletic commission’ to determine weigh-in’s, ensure no performance enhancing drugs have been used, and apprise them of ‘mexican rules wrestling’ while Bob-‘Enmascarado’ signs his death waiver assuming risk, liability and indemnity of parties involved.

    We’ll need to have a stare-down and photo shot between the 3-foot tall Sagrada and the 6+ foot tall Bob-Enmascarado, inches from an immediate confrontation, as they gaze fixedly and intently waiting to see if the other yields to intimidation. Words are exchanged, and seconds later abrupts into a ‘dust up’ as Bob-Enmascarado shoves Sagrada, security separating both men as they continue to trade barbs and jaw ups with one another, with Sagrado sneaking in a quick kick to the balls.

    Your also going to need a fight card that includes more tiny mexican wrestlers and opponents from the RCMP brass at the assistant and deputy commissioner ranks (maybe even the Chief Soup’s).

    Let this great fight commence!

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